Igit newbie needs help part 3

[pilot]

Pilot thanks for encouragement. She is boo hooing.last night about how tired she is and stressed from teaching job. I'm thinking wtf.classes started wed. Wait till the kids act up or issues with other teachers or whatever. This should be about as easy as it will ever be. You have a h who is helping with kids. See how tired you will be when you do it alone. I told her today to give me her schedule for weekend and I will work with her on it. We have a real estate deal we our working on together, we talked about that. All is good until it's talk about R or D. I am getting to a place that I know I will be ok either way. It's her I am worried about. She hides her depression very well. She is acting all confident and happy rt now. When she gets what she wants a D. Then big dose of reality coming.

igit, be careful with this line of thinking. I know you are probably right, that your W does not understand how difficult being on her own will be. I feel the same about my W too, as she has never been on her own and always had someone to take care of her. However, the trap you will fall into and seems you may be already is assuming she WILL fail and you will be there to tell her see I told you so as she comes crawling back. She may fail, and she may just make it. I get your line of thinking 'if you think it is hard now, just wait till..." but in the future try not to. For one, it is a sign that you have not detached and are worrying too much about what she is doing. That will cause you nothing but frustration and hurt.

I just moved my W into her new apt today. If I had to bet, I would say she is going to have a lot of troubles. But that is her problem, not mine to solve. Any involvement I have whether it is helping or hurting will do nothing but cause resentment towards me when things go bad. The best I can do is get out of her way and have no involvement so nothing can be my fault.

Best of luck to you buddy. Im still rooting for you.