above is the link to my old thread, which is locked
this vaca is really hard. It is tough to be a good dad and show my kids a good time when my W and I are in this situation. My MIL has told me to forget about the A because our problems existed before that. I agree with the latter part of this statement but I know that the A is an obstacle to our working on our M. As noted before, my W has not admitted to the A, says they are friends and that she can text and talk to whomever I want and that my desire for her to end this relationship with the OM is just another example of my controlling behavior and why she does not want to be married to me.
At one point yesterday when we were talking (hard not to when we spend the day at the beach together) she said her feelings towards me are her feelings and while she wants them to change, they have not. I said that if that is the case and this seems truly hopeless to her, then we should call it like it is and just file for the D and tell the kids. She was very taken aback by this idea and said that we need time. So I guess that is a good thing because it seems in her heart she does not want the D but the A is blocking her ability to really work on our M.
Me: 40, W: 40 M: 15, T: 18 D - 10, S - 7 D announcement 6/7/2014 A discovered 7/20/2014 (but denied by W) Still living together and sharing same bed
