Life is beginning to change and it's all baby steps, but the interactions with myself and WAW are completely different. It's funny seeing how the assault changed her perspective on everything. This morning we spoke again for about 45 minutes in the driveway again. It's become a new routine, but one that is completely relaxed.
During the conversation today, she made a comment how she noticed how much I cared based on my reaction. She said that she saw that I made it about her and how I even caught myself momentarily making it about me, but how I noticed that and I immediately mentioned that "I am sorry, this isn't about me, but it is about you"
She commented also how the relationship with the two of us doesn't seem to have the roller coaster feel anymore and she specifically said with both of us, so it was good to see that she owned that she contributed to it as well. I had made a comment about how hard it would be to stand and fight for our marriage if she ever began dating and I would have to begin moving in a different direction. Immediately after saying that, she said, "like moving on?" She then reminded me that she wanted us to go to a local amusement park as a family this weekend. Today she also invited me to join her and the kids for lunch and although it was brief, it was a very good time and we had a good conversation.
These are all baby steps, but the thing I have seen is that these steps do work. I am going to continue to GAL and follow the steps and follow all of Sandi's steps still. I am reading the steps in DR as what to do if the WAW begins responding to LRT and follow that closely to look for signs. I can see how I can immediately feel the impulse to want to just jump in head first, but I will continue to remember to take baby steps.
