Possible MLC WAH, and need guidance

[Atsbaby]

H showed up at 8:45. We put the kids to bed and then I went to bed...how about that for a 180! Avoided him and got a decent amount of sleep. Plus haven't been feeling well. Think it's the allergies.

So yesterday s10 went to dr. Strep and mild dehydration. My dad took him and I was waiting to hear back. Called and left a message after 1 1/2, but I know how dr offices can be. About 30 minutes later H calls. I tell him I haven't heard anything and he says, "I called your dad. They just got home. Told him I'd call and let you know." WTF?

His mo has always been text, not talking to me via phone! Again another shock for me.

For whatever reason, today was a struggle. I must just be in an emotional funk, plus I think I'm close to that lovely visit from my monthly guest. Anyways, I'm expecting too much from him...email or text or something. I NEED TO STOP EXPECTATIONS!

He did email me some pics from last nights football practice. S got to go to the local university and practice at an indoor facility....8 million dollars! It was pretty nice, but would have been better air conditioned, just saying!

I just looked at the pics and was really surprised H sent one of him and s together. Whatever. I'm done dancing. I need to move forward and I'm struggling.

On H way home tonight, he called to say he would stop and get one of those bagsters so we could clean up our yard from deck building. He has been saying this since March, when I thought we were still good. Why is he being so clear these days? I don't like it cause he's still wanting D.

I think I'm just going to have to accept that a d will come long before r. If that even happens. I could be feeling the pressure also since I meet with an Atty Tuesday. I really don't want to, but need to.

Life just stinks right now!