That said, I wish I had initially taken a MUCH harder line with my H last year. It's too late to take that path now, though, so I'm going to have to go with slow and steady and hope that it leads to a more lasting marriage at the end.
Totally disagree with that statement.
I've also heard the phrase.."A blowout is better than a small leak" (which I have found to be true.)
So, it's too late to do a 180? That's not how I interpret DR and DB. I actually understand it to mean, when what you are doing isn't working, that doing a complete 180 is called for and necessary. Then monitor results. Try to find something that works.
Find Bumble B's thread. I think it is in MLC. Then go find Why Try's thread.. I believe he has been in Newcomers...
Why Try is Bumble B's Husband...
He didn't turn around until she let go and took a hard stance. She was on here for months and months with barely any movement in him. Finally you can see her letting go and then finally she DID let go.
He then came on here and didn't tell us who he was. He wouldn't even say if he was a man or woman for awhile.
He even commented on her thread acting as if he was just another BS. He KNEW it was her. That was her last response that I know of right before his comment.
She went all that time taking the slow and easy approach and slowly she got stronger and started to let go. Once she started to tire of it and REALLY LET GO, he turned around FAST. Read their threads and see for yourself.
Last I knew, he was STILL trying to win her back and she is still wanting out, but hasn't left. Total turnaround in who wants the relationship and who doesn't.
