More confused than ever

[Train]

Wounded, as usual, has covered every, single thing I would have (and some things I wouldn't have) thought to contribute.

The only thing I can add is: anyone can cheat. And someone who cheats can cheat again. So no one can exactly predict the future, you're right.

But you can minimize the chances of your H cheating again by waking up every day and deciding to do something loving toward him. You can choose to meet his needs. That will keep his Love Bank full, and he won't "need" to seek companionship elsewhere.

And your H needs to do the same thing for you.

That's what we call a marriage.

This journey is so much more than what they did wrong to us and how they need to change. It's also about how WE can change to be better spouses and make our Ms something that only a fool would leave.

Piecing is HARD work, especially when an A was involved. I could write a novel, and I'm only four months in. It takes GUTS to even TRY.

But as wounded said, when he mentioned the laundry-list of negatives when a family is broken apart, I think it's worth a shot. And it's worth your BEST, most focused shot.

What made your H change his mind so quickly? That's anyone's guess. But here's something for you to chew on now that OM is the hot topic: what made YOU change YOUR mind so suddenly? As wounded pointed out with your own quotes, it was only a couple/few weeks ago that you were wanting your H and family back. I get where you are. But how did you get there *that fast* - seemingly almost overnight?

These are rhetorical questions. But they're some things for you to consider when you want to be skeptical of your H's "timing" of popping back into your life.

Sometimes, sh!t happens. And people decide overnight. With my H? It was a movie - one I had never watched. Then it was settling in to his own apartment. The silence. The loneliness. Couple all that with him seeing me GAL and looking good and smiling and confident? It all hit him like a ton of bricks.

Every once in a while, it takes something just that simple.

Hang in there, T0.