Starsky, not to put the cart before the horse, but so that I'm fully prepared, I'd love to take you up on the offer of helping draft the letter W would need to send to OM.
Unless you have a template, my high level thoughts are basically W needs to tell OM that she has decided to work on her M with me and will need to cease all communication immediately. This includes phone, email, facebook, etc. She can't include any 'I'm sorry..' statements. Anything else??
I'm aware that she needs me to approve and send it.
Tar,
You can google infidelity affairs "no-contact letter" and get several good templates. It should be brief, to the point, and CLEAR. Something like:
"Dear _______,
I am writing this to tell you that from this point forward, I need to end all contact with you. This includes not only in person, but any phone, email or text messages. I've decided to try to work on my marriage with Tarheel, and I know that our affair has been very hurtful and disrespectful to him and our family.
I would ask that you respect my wishes in this, as my husband and I have a lot of hard work ahead of us if we are to repair these wounds.
(Wife's first name) -- no "Love," "Sincerely" or anything else.
But that's just me. Do google other templates and find something you think is appropriate. The important thing is that it NOT contain anything like "While I enjoyed our time together, I now realize . . . " or "I will always remember you fondly but . . . " -- nothing like that. I purposely used both your first name and the "my husband" part and the "a-word" in order to be painfully honest with the man about his contributions to the damage to your family.
