Question for anyone reading this thread; do any of you have WAW who uses rudeness to maintain emotional distance? How have you dealt with this issue?

I have noticed a pattern where my W will let her guard down enough to enjoy herself in my presence and interact with me in normal conversation, then shortly after will turn on the rudeness to keep distance between us. I have dealt with this by ignoring the rudeness and acting like I didn't hear her tone and attitude when I respond. "Believe none of what you hear and less than half of what you see", right? I used to get mad and respond in kind; tell her I would not tolerate being talked to that way, etc., but W seemed to feed off of this negative energy so now I just pretend I didn't hear it.

Any thoughts? Other approaches?

Me37, W30, S7
Married 10yrs 05/11/04
ILYBINILWY 22/09/13
Disc. OM1 26/09/13
Disc. STD from OM2 03/02/14
Affair Confession 21/06/14

W and I share same apartment (for a few more days).
W isn't pushing for D.