Dealing with ongoing affair -which may now be over

[PeterV2]

Wonka;
She keeps bringing up that incident. There are a few other incidents that she also keeps bringing up.
1) That I was looking at porn until she asked me to stop which I did.
2) That I wouldn't seek to change my sep agreement with my ex until W threatened to leave.
3) That I was too busy to take time out to spend with her when she needed to take time off.
4) That I would be persistent until I got my way - especially on the closing date of the RH which I pushed for Nov 2012 and she wanted Mar 2013.
She claims all these things contributed to her deciding to walk away in Oct 2012. But she didn't start her A until Apr 2013 and I didn't find out about it until Dec 2013.
She told me the other night that after we went to MC in Sept 2013 and I admitted to settling with my ex and losing $156K in the deal that my W didn't know about that and after learning that decided to hook up with OM. I don't believe her. I think she was already sleeping with him back in June 2013.

But we discussed that 10 year old incident the other day and although I apologized again for it she said it might help if I wrote her a letter in that regard.