What you are feeling is very normal for someone who has a spouse that is slowly inching his/her back to reality. Yes, you are scared and worried about him, the relationship and how things should/will be. It is very normal.
You are seeing small signs of reconnection and you aren't sure that you can trust those signs. Again, very normal. How long does it take for him to return to reality? It will take as long as it takes until he's completely healed. One of the things that you need to do for now is accept him for who he is and not the man you married. Once the full reconnection takes place, it is another 18-24 months before the crisis person will settle down and become the mature person that he/she will be. You've got a ways to go and there are going to be many ups and downs and you will need to keep your expectations very low or zero. You will see him swinging back and forth, i.e., coming close and then distancing. You will see him withdraw every once in a while to think. All very normal.
You, on the other hand, will become frustrated, disappointed, upset, and impatient quite often. If your spouse is truly reconnecting, this will be hardest part of the MLC journey for you. Why? Because the signs are starting to appear and you get anxious and want it over and done with. It doesn't happen that way and that's why you need to accept him for who he is today and dig deeper for patience. Stop expecting him to be the man he was pre-crisis. Stop expecting him to respond to questions the way you think he should, stop expecting him to do or say things that he would have done pre crisis. This is a new man, new relationship, which means once he's come out of the crisis completely, he may think and/or act differently. He may determine that his lifestyle is going to change, i.e, if he was a workaholic, he may opt to relax a bit more. Some do retain a few of the mlc traits after they wake up and others don't. So, for today, don't watch the pot boil. Focus on you, your son and your interests. Leave the rest in God's hands. Your h is not fully baked up and it's going to take a while before that occurs.
If you haven't read this thread, I suggest you take some time and do so:
