This is what happens when you drink the STFU juice and bide your time. Good job!
The only advice I would offer is to be very sparing with your emotional bids because the MLCer, while in the crisis, cannot handle too much of it. I've read Gottman's books and I think those emotional bids are good for people who are already in healthy R's/M's. Those emotional bids are what bonds a couple and builds up the R.
MLC? Not so much. The MLCer is a different animal altogether and I think Gottman wouldn't know what to do with it if it hit him right on the nose.
Just be mindful of this, ok?
Another thing--
Me: "And there is no one I'd want to help me more than you, so if you can, that would be my choice."
Try to be a tad more careful with this type of approach. To me, in reflecting back on my MLC experience, it just introduces more pressure on an already stressed state of mind for the MLCer. We're fragile...remember?
I'm not seeing GUBU stepping up much in helping you out with the farm chores. If you have to as the occasion arises, go ahead and hire that young Huck Finn guy for certain tasks/jobs to reduce the burden on you.
