Hi mleigh, Don't beat yourself up. You have been put through a lot all because of your H and what he has said and done. It is only natural to be angry. It would be weird if you weren't at least somewhat. It's hard to keep up all the DBing and knowing you have worked so hard and there is your H who really needs to be the one who does the work in all honesty. It can really get a person angry, the unfairness of it all.
It's one of the reasons that, in order for any of this to work for us or our M, you have to drop any and all expectations. You "expected" your H to respond to your text and when he didn't it got to you. Yes, he should have and he was wrong not to but at the same time he isn't capable of doing much of anything that isn't all about him. It's so hard to do 100% of the time. I still have a hard time when it comes to things that are about our D14. Just yesterday my D was supposed to stay with her mom starting yesterday until Sunday. Out of the blue my MIL pulls up and drops off my D14 saying that my W said that she decided that D would just stay with me for another week and then with her for the next 2 weeks since school is starting next week and my W lives closer to the school and it makes sense for her to stay there for the first week. OK, but why didn't she contact me about it. Make sure that it was what I felt as well and I was OK with it. Even at least to let me know my D was on her way back to my place at the very least! I am still upset about this but I also realize it's because, at least when it comes to something as important as our D, I "expect" her to act like an adult, to at least make sure what SHE wants is also what I want or am at least willing to go along with! That I hadn't made plans or was unable to have her for another week.
I don't think you did any real damage mleigh. Just learn how to do it differently next time. You are fine!
