A couple of new developments...H says he wants to buy me out of our house. Thumbs up! This is the easiest situation for me; I don't have to list the house, show it, get it ready and keep it clean, pay real estate agent commission, etc. Once our vacation home sells, I'll have enough cash to go house-hunting. Then, when I find one, all I have to do is take my stuff and go. Then he can come back and be here alone, and feel what that feels like. He left almost everything he owns here -- now it makes sense...he was always planning to move back, only I wouldn't live here WITH him anymore.
Also, H was left homeless last month when his sister sold her house. Turns out she and her husband have put an offer on a house that is for sale just TWO houses down from this one. Oh what a nice little family compound it will be. I think I am glad I will not be here then.
Journaling...I actually think I have dropped the rope. He keeps sending these exceedingly polite/formal e-mails about selling assets, etc., and then always has to include something about what he's doing, how great he's doing, something important he did, how did my (fill in the blank) go?, etc. I just don't want to hear about his life! Really, he told me NOTHING for a year, and asked me NOTHING about my life. I just respond to his requests about stuff we have to do for mediation, and that's it. I just do not want the stress anymore, and I am getting very busy with my own life now. I just don't care to respond to the other stuff. I think this is good. I just cannot bring myself to engage in friendly conversation. I guess I have finally given up for good, and the hurt is too much. I have more peace now than I have had in a year.
Just taking it day by day...
Me 53, XH 57 M 20 (+1.5) years, no kids BD June '13 H moved out July '13 Confirmed long-suspected PA Feb '14 H filed for D Nov. '14 D March '15