This is terrifying - I hope you understand

[Shakspr]

Thx, Hopetex. Yeah, I'm strong enough that I will get better, and I am committed to being a candidate for world's best Dad - which means no mental breakdowns allowed. W still asks me how I am when she catches me at a low spot, because she still cares about me as a person, but is not receptive to any course of action other than "AMPUTATE." And she wants to go fast because the process is painful and she wants it over with. So how the heck am I supposed to respond?

I have done my fair share of admitting my faults (see initial post), but her dependent/codependent tendencies will have to be addressed if there is EVER a reconciliation. I haven't written down a balance sheet (maybe I should?), but if I think about the stuff in DR from the W's POV, well, she is not blameless in this.

Perhaps you should write some of those same things down as an exercise to remind yourself it isn't ALL your doing.

Shakspr