MY TRAGIC WAW STORY PART III

[ItHurts]

Hi Guys!
Thanks for the advice. So the meeting with WAW was very successful and we have some closure now. In reference to what Mr. Bond has been saying, WAW said almost verbatim the same thing...that if she doesn't make this move she will eventually resent me for it. So once again Mr. Bond hit the nail on the head.

Now we did talk a bit about reconciliation. The WAW said that she has been telling people that she absolutely will not rule out possible reconciliation with me some time in the future. She said we have a strong foundation and we do still love each other. She said she can't make any promises, nor did I ask her to, but that she can see it possibly happening down the road. She told me that me not willing to be her friend recently was a big impediment in her consideration for R. She said that now that I am able to be her friend and respect her decision to move that it really shows how I've changed for the better as a person.

She said that right now she needs to do her own thing, that she doesn't want to be married. She said she is so ashamed for "f****G me over" and that she can't believe how stupid she was. She said that she isn't stupid and that she knows what she is walking away from and how she may regret it. She said that knowing she can keep in touch with me now means a lot to her because she didn't see R as a possibility if we weren't going to be friends and be talking. So we basically left it where we are going to let the marriage end and move on as good friends for now and whatever the future will bring it will bring.
Ironically, as we concluded our 3 hour conversation, as I started the car to leave, a song was on the radio that WAW would always ask me to sing to her during our marriage whenever we happened to hear it. She yelled out "are you serious???!" as she looked at the radio and then she started to cry. I was beside myself that of all songs, that one happened to be on the radio. It was a really weird moment. So she asked me for a hug...she gave me a real long one and kissed my on my neck. We said good night, she asked me to text her when I got home safely and that was that.

Then early this morning she calls me in tears. Her sister who was home from school for summer, and who was very supportive of her over the summer while all of this went down, left to go back to school this morning. WAW said on the phone that that was upsetting her and also that she couldn't get "that song" out of her head. She said it's a lot of emotion. She said everyone is moving on abut she has to wait over a month before she can move. She said I'm going to have a great life with your lady friend now. She said her sister will be back with her friends at school. She said she has to wait a month before she can move away from all of this. So I talked to her for about 1/2 hour or so on the phone.

So as it is now, the marriage is done. She is going to FL and we are moving forward as friends for now. I think this is a good idea because then it's not really such a final good-bye for either of us...we will still be able to talk and communicate. She said again that if she gets to a place where she wants to R, that she will come after me. I asked her how can she say that since she doesn't know what my sitch will be whenever that day comes, if it does at all. I said what if I am in a new relationship by then. She said she would just come out and ask me how serious I am with said woman. She said she would then explain that she wants to pursue a relationship with me again. So I guess that means if WAW ever does want to R, she will have no hesitation in letting me know. This is good because most people here, such as what Sandi alluded to, state that the WAW should be the one to initiate such conversations. This way it will be that way.

So all in all it was a productive meeting, it didn't turn out as I had hoped it would...but it did turn out as I expected it to. I feel better knowing we are friends and that we will still be in contact. It makes the "good-bye" far less painful as we will still be a small part of each other's lives going forward. It also leaves the bridge intact for possible future R. The WAW said this too.

So for now I think "My Tragic WAW Story" finally ends here. Now it's just a matter of letting some months go by and letting her go to FL and just seeing where life takes us. Maybe we will R one day, maybe not. She made no promises nor did I ask for any. She just said that she's told people "I'm not going to lie, I can't rule out reconciling with IH some time down the road. The foundation is still there and we still love each other."
So I guess that's really all I can ask for in this sitch. She's open to it as a possibility but for now, as Mr. Bond said, she needs to do this FL thing for her. I think validating her words, supporting her decision, and agreeing to be friends was the best thing I could've done last night. Now only time will tell what will happen down the road.

What a long, strange trip it's been.