Why do you still have the need to talk to her? She still plans to move and yet you are still trying to change her mind. This will only re-enforce her idea to move.
Let it go and let her go.
If she doesn't do this and make the decision ON HER OWN, she will resent you for it in the future. I've seen that happen too many times.
Well as I said, because Pilot's post makes perfect sense to me. What have I to lose at this point? I told you, I don't really believe she actually wants to move as much now. I don't believe every single WAW is identical. People are individuals and they have their own set of circumstances that make them act a certain way. In my WAW's case, she never thought we could have what he had before ever again, now she knows we can and it throws her for a loop. Her decision is being questioned in her head because of it. She herself has said so.
I can't just ignore her now for two months and "let her go" because then that's it for me, the end of the road. This my last resort. I'm going to end up without her either way so why should I not speak to her? I don't have 3 weeks now to go NC, I did that for two months and it did exactly what it was supposed to do. It brought WAW and I back to speaking terms now. I can't start that cycle again when I can just talk to her now, especially after all that's happened the past two weeks. The grass is always greener already happened for her. Her regrets have already happened for her. Now her issues are about her alone, not our marriage.
So I'm not just letting her go because I know her, I spent 18 years with her, I know the WAW and I know my wife...and I know this decision isn't as solid in her head as she lets on. She doesn't want to "hurt me again" so she refrains from sharing anything in her head that she feels would "lead me on." I am of the mind she simply cannot hurt me anymore than she already has...I'm a big boy and I can take it. So why not take the chance? After all, she knows what I am going to talk about, and if she was so unreceptive to the idea, I wouldn't have gotten a text reply back almost immediately and wouldn't have been able to set up a meeting on such short notice. She is receptive to me now for the first time in months. She's in love with me again. So I have a power I was stripped of before.
I'm running out time before she leaves and I am running out of legal time to reverse the divorce. Time is not my ally anymore...I don't have "the gift of time" anymore. It's all or nothing now. That's why I am handling it this way. It's do or die at this point.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
