I know, I'm freaking out and acting like I've been separated for years but it has been a week. A WEEK. Oy. I need to settle down and seriously detach. It's a HUGE struggle for me. I need to act as if on that one I think. Fake it till I make it because the real thing isn't working.
D is DEFINITELY getting more of H's attention than she did before. He was more of an "in the room" dad before. And if she did something he didn't like while he was on his laptop and in the same room with her, he'd bark at her and then resume his laptop viewing. He used to be super grumpy and snappy with her and now he's Mr. Letsgotothepark or Mr. Outforicecream. I'm glad he's focusing on her because his relationship is starting to get better with her and for that I'm glad HOWEVER, why could he not be THIS dad before BD? He's very concerned about how she's handling all this separation stuff and I think that is great. I hate that THIS is what is making him tune in as a father. I know he feels guilty but that's not why he's more attentive and involved. Maybe the pain he felt about our marriage prevented him from interacting healthily with her? I'm not willing to accept that blame though. I feel like the quality of his fathering is entirely up to him, good marriage or not. Am I wrong?
