A new M--a new me, a new him!

[reachingHigher]

Thank you job, and takevowsserious and 2BH!

I responded to you dear 2BH on your thread.

Job, we didn't all do the GC hike. My older son and sister and BIL (who met us out there) did the overnight hike in and out. H and S14 and I toured Indian cliff dwellings and trendy towns in the area and had a great time.

Thank you, job, for saying I'm at the finish line! Oh, how I wanted you to say that for so long...how I wanted this all to be over when it wasn't!

I truly feel in my gut it is over. Just like you know when little things are wrong...just little things....I have my radar up high and I know everything is right...just right!

My H and I have tried to make routines to make sure this never happens again. We give each other space and privacy and also work to create fun times and dates together. I try to appreciate who he is now.

And, job, just to let you know...I've been with H 24/7 for a week and only saw him take one drink. He started a beer last night but only half-finished it as he wanted to see all of S20's pics from the Canyon hiking trip. It's like the alcohol problem is out of his system altho he will probably drink casually and socially from time-to-time.

TVS, dear TVS, thank you for your kind words. Yes, I so remember the darkest of days and the many posts from you and other keeping me going. It was my goal to come out of this respecting myself and my H if we D. But...the happiest of endings I could only dream of happened! And I feel so much internal joy about the things I have learned and am learning about myself. I am working on "me" every day. Not for my H. Not for my children. But for me...and being comfortable who I am and who I want to be! It is such a great feeling...I try to stay on the positive thought path and when I stray to the negative thoughts...I pamper myself until I can get back to positive! That's what my clinical psychologist told me to do.

My wish for you is for happy reconciliation in the future. Galbaby and I have been there and I soooooo want you there too!!!! But, in your usual humor, strength and grace, you will be comfortable with you and your boys no matter how/where you end up!

And a round of hugs for all
rH