A new M--a new me, a new him!

[reachingHigher]

Thank you so much to all who posted in reply: nero, mleigh4, TL72*, AJM and job!!!

I wanted to post a little update.

I did have my first real estate closing last month in my new career! I was thrilled to get a paycheck finally, and I have two listings, one under contract already. I am getting so many leads I had to give some away--as I want to properly service the ones I have and I am still learning, learning, learning!

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My H and I and our two sons (ages 14 and 20) just got back yesterday from a roadtrip to the Grand Canyon. It was marvelous. The boys and we agreed it was probably our best vacation ever.

We had some in-depth talks on the way there about serious social or personal issues. My H is now approaching life with the wisdom of the experienced. He no longer has a "me first" mentality. He even said to the boys his life is "half over" at 47. I was thrilled to hear this as he told me he is eligible to retire in 10 years but doesn't want to look at it as retiring. He merely wants to start a new career and is going to think and plan what that will be. He is full of life and passion! These are the things he felt he was missing.

He treated me like a queen every step of the way during this vacation. He is normal, balanced and happy. He doesn't have the paranoia about the cellphone or his conversations or his life. He doesn't look like he is "on the prowl". He is a man of peace and wisdom.

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I reflected privately on our past years as we were traveling.

I believe my H was a textbook MLC from start to finish. He had some childhood issues. He had a death in his family of origin around the time he turned 40. He went through years of depression and turmoil. He dove into serious replay with all the trimmings. He moved out, desired and explored women. He drove the D train to almost the very end and stopped one week short of D and "delayed" it. He went through emotional anguish and turmoil. He withdrew. He took about a year and a half to properly ground himself after deciding not to D and then his MLC ended. He now is a model husband, father, provider, lover and at peace with who he is and his life.

He and I do sometimes run into a snag...usually to do with my fears that came out of the MLC experience. We talk through and work through each one.
My H even admitted for the first time, during vacation, he wishes he hadn't posted some of the hurtful things he did publicly on FaceBook.

Be encouraged, my friends, some spouses do make the full journey and come out better than you could imagine!

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This morning he and I had a couple of hours alone without our boys. I made him a meal like we used to make our first year together. It was baked brie with French bread, grapes and other fruit and smoked salmon.

I lit a candle for the two of us and set our table with tablecloth and cloth napkins. I smiled at my H and told him he has only gotten more handsome through the years! He said he felt I have also gotten more attractive to him through the years.

We recounted the moments of our "first time together". We both remember it with astounding clarity.

I can say I am totally in love with him and can only look forward to a bright future together!

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job, our boys are doing very well. The older one is about to start his 3rd year in engineering school, still living at home, still on full academic scholarship. One of his hobbies is "sword fighting" once a week with friends on campus.

The younger one is about to start his first year at high school in a private Christian high school. He will be doing cross country competition this fall.

They both have relaxed back into the normal, happy family life. Issues come up and we deal with them. But MLC is past history.