H's MLC #3

[2BHappy]

EARLY this morning, I noticed H is still awake watching TV in bed, I was very tired but made a comment
Told H I would like to be held, told H that there are things I need as a woman...then maybe I said something else like "that you are not giving me" but I was so tired I honestly dont know if I thought the last thing or said it out loud...Iknow I said the first two out loud. H was very sleepy also so not sure how much attention he paid to anything I said...

But he does initate sex...he probably thought I was talking ONLY about sex...

I'm not going to follow up on the conversation today, cause if he did hear what I said, good,,,if not I will leave it alone for now, I dont want him to feel like if we have sex then I'm going to want to have a deep conversation. I know that is too much pressure for him now.

BUT every day Im getting more set in what I want, even though I might not have it right away even if I leave my M, but each day I'm thinking about leaving. At some point there will need to be a R or M discussion, I dont want my next discussion to be me telling my H that I want him to leave and I want a D. Or maybe that is next discussion I will have, IF H does not bring up our M or R, then why should I at this point.

I do want to tell my H my needs as a woman, I want to go on dates, I want to be held, I want to ML often, I want to feel loved by my H.

Need advice, dont hold back, I feel myself slipping..something else is changing in me.