As for St. MrsZew, I just don't know. + It would appear that she has stopped contact with OM (plural). - I wouldn't say that she is warming. - She is still sleeping in the guest room. - Still spending over an hour a day on the phone with posse. - She leaves the room (or the house) to take any phone call. + She has started talking to her mother and sister again.
She wants a notebook for her business. Yesterday, she told me they were available at X and Y, so I could pick where I wanted to buy it for her. All I heard was another entitled demand for something that should be a business expense, not a family expense, and that there was option Z, not buying it for her at all.
In summary, she may be doing some things that are good for her in the long run, but she still isn't thinking anything about an R with Zew. And that's where she was a few months ago. She wanted to clean up her act in order to be able to survive without me -- not to save her M or family, but to be independent of me. Together, but not dependent, doesn't seem to be in the plan.
Now the question of the day.
So I'll file for D. My position hasn't changed; I prefer R to D, but by filing, I'm taking open M off the table. I realize I'm also forcing a choice, but I'm ok with that now. I need that clarity in my life.
So, do I:
a) talk to W the day before filing, to see if anything has changed before throwing the grenade. Let her know what's coming.
b) after filing, but before being served, tell w that I prefer R to D, but have filed to take open M off the table
c) I've restated my position a million times. say nothing and let the shock of the process server have full effect. If she wants to save any part of this, she'll figure it out. If she doesn't, move on Zew, move on.
