mleigh - thank you for the advice. I will admit I was driving myself crazy with the snooping before he actually left the house - I still find myself checking phone and credit card and it drives me nuts. I don't have any hard evidence and the calls and texts seem to be few and far between from what i had expected before - but like everyone says - you can't change it so just let it go - that is what I am working on. I haven't posted for a while - I try to get on with my life and then I go through times when I just get obsessed over it again. Like tonight when he has the kids out and I am home alone - I try to stay busy but sometimes it is just overwhelming. I am a strong person but this is so hard. I really don't think he knows what he wants other than to get away. He has talked to the kids about buying a house several times but hasn't made any moves in that direction that I am aware of - he is currently at his parents rental home. He has never used the term divorce just that we should "go our separate ways". He seems to seek validation from me on trivial things like what time to take the kids to dinner since school has started. He is like a scared little boy when I see him -so depressed and flat - there isn't really any adult conversation at all other than plans for the kids and his communication with them seems so juvenile (the texts that I see). I am still new to this but it feels like an eternity - I guess I will just focus on day to day - i get myself in trouble with trying to decide what direction to go at the moment. I am a religious person and I try so hard to let go and let God but my human side always intervenes.
