"The third time's lucky. "

[TL72*]

Feeling some initial anger today - the bank contacted me that the escrow refund check was cashed - the ex cashed it with only his signature on it when both our names our on it. I was awarded the house in the divorce and told to refi within one year. I did the refi within a few months and the check was forwarded to his address and he cashed it without even discussing it. That made me angry. I contacted the bank because they told me just a few days ago that the address it was sent to was mine and that no other address was on file but I see a copy of the cleared check and it has his address on it. She called me and told me that it is fraud for him to cash it with only one signature and Capital One (his bank) should never have cleared it. She's sending me paperwork to sign and that allows them to retrieve the funds. I had emailed him Monday and informed him that the check may be forwarded to him and would he like to split it 50/50. He never responded. Technically it's all mine because I took on the house and it's for taxes and insurance, I made the mortgage payments each month and it came from those funds. Part of me - the part that has resentment- says sign the paper and cause him trouble because what he did was wrong. Mostly though, (I'm still thinking on it, this just happened and I can't make a decision like that quickly) I believe that I will just let him keep the money and consider it done and over with.
It's almost 1400.00 and I think he needs it more than I do. I have considered emailing him and letting him know that the bank informed me and that it is fraud but that he can keep it and I wish him the best. I sort of want him to know that I know (which is obvious I suppose that I know) I don't want to have further confrontation, but I also don't want him thinking "haha I pulled one over on her" and just roll over and be submissive ya know? I suppose the most graceful response would be to just let it go, it is what it is, and his opinion of me no longer matters. Me knowing that I did the right thing is enough. For my own mental health I need to just forgive, move forward and just completely let this go. It's easier said than done, I have some fighter in me and part of me really wants to just rub it in that I could have charges brought up. That's just vindictive though and bitter and I don't want to be that woman. Just journaling, helps me to get this out of my mind. I guess I have my answer just by reading this that the right thing to do is just let it go and say nothing. Giving it to God.