Don't do counseling yet. Save that for if she wants to. If you do want to throw it out there, and she's interested (which I doubt during the EA), make sure the counselor is solutions oriented and committed to saving marriages, not giving her reassurance for her decision to quit.

Prior to reading DR, at least read and try to follow Sandi's 37 rules. It's a good place to start.

Me: 34 W:33
T: 10 M: 6
S: 6 D: 5
BD: 5/14
Still together(ish)
Not giving up: 7/14
D talk has slowed, a lot.
Gradually working on things together. Still separate bedrooms.
Slow and Steady wins the race.