Mighty, for the short amount of time you've been on this journey coupled with the cards he dealt you, you really are doing well. You will still have your emotional moments but focus on the positive and continue staying strong.
I totally get when you say you put his issues before your hurt at times, because I do it too. You're just a good person who cares for others and isn't the narcissist your H has become. You have genuine compassion for others, despite what they've done to you. H, in the meantime, is in ME land and will be there for a long time I'm sure.
As to the contact, that is typical MLC script. My H does the same thing. He can go nuclear on me one minute and then text me all day long with random things just to make sure he hasn't lost me for good. I too no longer rush to respond and when I finally do, it's quick and to the point.
Take this time to truely look at yourself and figure out what YOU want. My H is away for a month right now and that is what I'm doing. My mind still wanders to OW and all the hurt he's caused, but I try to focus on me and what I want. Will I be able to forgive him if he ever does come back, will we be able to get passed this, could we really have a R after. That's the things you should focus on, focus on ME and not on him. I know it makes my days easier!
Me: 35, H: 36, M: 6, S: 1, D: 3, BD: 4/21/14 H still living at home
