I can't remember if you are seeing an IC. Have you ever talked to one about how to communicate with others (especially your W)! Read any material on the subject?

Bob, I don't know if you have a serious anger problem or if it's just her that triggers your anger. If you are seeing an IC, I hope you will get advice in how to manage those reactions to her.

If you don't have an IC, I hope you will consider having some sessions for those two issues, especially. Maybe someone here can offer information in where to turn for solutions. I hope 25yrs will come by and make suggestions.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!