Quick to listen, Slow to speak

[holdingon]

Thanks to the advice of Deb and Water, I told my H I would like to go along to look for a car for our S. I felt like this was something that I should do... I was almost compelled to do it.

H said he wanted to go with the boys, but it was ok if I went.

We left early yesterday morning. He was there. My old H. NOT the alien. It was FUN. He asked my OPINION about things and LISTENED to me. I offered my opinion. I did not care about what he was thinking, what the right thing to say would be. I WAS ME. And, it felt WONDERFUL. We went to lunch.

Went again today. Again, it was like old family times. There was NO uncomfortableness, it was NORMAL. NOTHING seemed out of place... except I felt like it was "hands off" as far as my H was concerned.

He seems interested in everything I bring up...

No R talk at all, of course. But boy, do I want to know what the heck is going on???

SO... so many questions...What is up? Why is he so nice? What is going on?

How can he not see how wonderful this is? Is it really MORE wonderful with OW? HOW could it be? And if he thinks it IS, well, maybe we DO need to forget about it.

I know, I know... NO expectations... but HOW can nothing come from this? I know I have to see this as JUST a God given two wonderful and I mean WONDERFUL two days. But, I sure want something to happen.

I am trying to be somewhat distant. Is it crazy or what, but when you get in that Moving On mode something like this happens???

If he is not wondering "what the heck is going on" well, forget it. If he did not feel some connection, well, he's dead inside, and I don't want that anyway.

Anyway, I'm going to keep praying.