Swell...Apparently, there were some conversations between D20 and my sis about my lack of a job last spring.
That really hurt.
And, I tried to maintain my own power throughout this conversation, but it really wavered right here. I felt punched in the stomach. My sister did this in Houston too when she approached D20 and asked if she wanted to live in Houston...without telling me.
In the meantime, it comes up that mom and sis talk daily and she doesn't understand why I don't talk to her.
I really try to explain. I say that it's hard because I know you don't get where I'm coming from.
That's when I was told that she has been through terrible things too.
IDK. I felt dismissed, judged, lesser than...I felt...and the girls did too...which I thought was strange. D20 was shaking and said after, I felt like we are completely alone in the world.
This is hard to sort through...mainly because it was really painful and it's hard for me to face. They said some terrible things...all with a smile on their face and they obviously feel that they are the better, more compassionate, loving, better people...and I am a bad mom.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
