I know...my WAW right now is the complete opposite of who she was for 38 years...everyone sees it. its like her priorities shifted from being this loving family member who disliked all the fake plastic surgery girls at her work, to becoming one of them...her cousin also mentioned that she said she feels like a bad mother sometimes..guilt? who knows. But I would deffinatly not go for a women like that now...she is all about the status and how she can look fufier.
Me: 42 W: 39 D: 2 age 6 and 9 D-Day: Dec 29 13 Seperated: 3/20/14 Mediation retainer : 5/20/14 She filed: 06/25/14
pilot and oad, it makes me feel so much better to read these lasts few posts of yours. It seems we are going through a similar time of questioning.
My H is a new person too right now, and most of his changes are not for the better. (and like your wife oad, he is becoming like people he used to dislike)
I too am questioning whether it is worth it to try to earn back the love of someone I wouldn't date if I just met him. And yet here we are still persisting for now.
Good luck guys, Lisa B
Me: 34 H: 30 M: 4 years BD: 6/15/14 He moved out 6/30/14 OW1: EA then PA after BD Now he's dating multiple OWs I'm over it and moving on.
Pilot, I feel for you brother. You have posted on my sitch and I have appreciated it. A few books that really have helped me by Gary smalley.if he only new understanding your wife and the other is Joy that last. These books are inspiring and may give you a boost. I have been dealing with my sitch since late jan. Similar stuff married 17yrs 3 little kids. The one thing that has helped me is getting rid of all my anger. I don't know if my sitch has changed for the better recently or not. Time will tell. My wife has started talking a little bit more last 10 days. It was 2 weeks ago I blew up on her and finally decided to forget about her. Her A if still going on is her problem not mine. I have 3 great kids and have been a super dad last 6 months. I have a new faith in God. New motto what matters to God matters. Live well pilot and your reward will come. Remember carma is real. Your w will wake up some day and will realize what she lost. Maybe you will be there to catch her and maybe you wont.
M 54 W 48 T 19 M 17 D 12 Twin S 6 Twin S 6 Ilybnilwy 1/26/14 A discovered 2/3/14 D filed 7/25/14 Sumons served 8/14/14
I too am questioning whether it is worth it to try to earn back the love of someone I wouldn't date if I just met him. And yet here we are still persisting for now.
Ok, I think I win the GAL and PMA in front of the WAW award today. W and I took the kids to the beach. It was a good day, kids were playing in the water, W and I were having a few beers, tossing the football around. After a bit, we were sitting in our beach chairs listening to some Zac Brown, when we heard a man yell for help. I looked up and saw a family of 4 about 100 yards offshore and the dad yelled help again. I jumped up and swam out there. I had no idea what was wrong. They did not seem to be flailing, and all 4 were together. I figured it was a shark bite or something. So I get out there, and the older kid, a boy about 10, was going under. I grabbed him, and held him above water. The dad yelled at me to help his daughter who he was holding. I grabbed her as well. So now I have 2 kids. The dad then yelled at me to help him too. The mom was not saying anything, but she was struggling as well. As I held on to the 2 kids, well, they were clinging like magnets, a kayak came up and helped the dad and I swam next to the mom while holding onto the two kids and guided her back to the beach.
So next time you are looking for a GAL, save a couple of kids from drowning. Jokes aside, once I got back to shore and began to process what had just happened, I about lost it. The fear in those kids eyes and the helpless plea for help from the dad. I mean, I hate it for him, but I hated it more for the kids. And what make me madder than hell is that when I got back to the beach, there were dozens of people all lined up along the shore to watch. Hell it is probably on YouTube by now. What the H3ll people. Swim out and help...there were kids out there.
At any rate, I guess that probably makes a good impression for the day in front of W.
Me: 42 W: 32 Married 7 years together 8.5 S1: 7 S2:7 Bomb #1: 09-16-13 Recon #1: 11/13 A discovered 04-03-2014 W filed D 05-19-14 but never served me I filed D 12-02-2014 S 05-31-14 Divorced 5-19-16
So did you agree to her terms? Paying her expenses to live there? (Which seems to be typical for the WAW to want H to pay for her new life.) I think you will feel strong resentment about it....if your feelings for her change. Maybe those feelings are already changing due to all you have gone through these past months. I see it happen sometimes, almost like some type of delayed reaction once the LBS starts to realize he deserves better. Sometimes it seems to be a passing emotion and sometimes it doesn't pass.
Anyway, glad the boys are going to the school you wanted them to attend.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
