What is "Living Life to the Fullest", Alex? #7

[Georgiabelle]

Thanks JG and Wonka. I did something I wasn't supposed to do. When I saw that Robin Williams died of an apparent suicide, it reminded me of my h. No, don't think h is suicidal. H is very funny and we were very similar humor wise (note were)-except he suffers from severe depression and I'm generally a happy person. Kind of the yin and yang thing.

Anyway, I saw where he tweeted that he hoped people would see after this brilliant man's death that depression is a serious illness. He said he lives with pain every day and the humor helps hide it. It's so interesting that h cut everyone who knows him off and uses twitter to present himself the way he wants others to see him. It's how he met OW. I bring this up because I don't miss that. I hope that doesn't make me sound cold. I wanted very badly for my h to feel *good* and *enjoy* the kids. I think he did sometimes. Of course he that he thought our R was preventing him from joy and happiness. Now he self medicates. Drinks daily. And the reality is he would really have to look at himself and figure out why he behaves the way he does. Very impulsive. He used to tweet funny stuff about the kids or the dogs and now he tweets the f word, horrible things about his coworkers, OW vag( you know the rest), people asking for **** photos. It's sad and bizarre.

However, I realize that this isn't my battle to fight. I have to leave him alone. He will either deal with it or not. I point this out because I used to kick into high gear of " let's try new meds." " you need to see a psychiatrist." Blah. Blah. Blah. That was a cheese less tunnel for me to wander down. It's part of why he can't be alone. Why would you want to be with the person you despise? Himself. He has said so a number of times. Just thinking outloud.

Ran 3 miles today. Good client visits. Talked fantasy football with my boss. Met some nice peeps on my flight. Bad hair day:-(. Can't have it all every day:-)