WAH - next chapter

[LisaB]

Oh crap. DB failure again.
When I got home he started messaging me about coming this week to pick up his things. I replied and told him this week would not work and we got into a texting conversation about that and some other trivial subjects.

I was very frustrated that he keeps planning to come by my house to pick up his things, and yet changes his plans nearly every time. My frustration came across through snippy texts, and he picked up on it and even commented about it, then stopped communicating.

My friends, I am not doing so well with all of this. The H I had for 4 years is gone and I don't know where he went. This new man is somewhat unpredictable and unreadable but he is not the H I had. This new person, I do not like him!

And I do not like how I feel and act around him. Even though I do not like this new arrogant person, I miss the old H and I want him back! And I think all this confusion is affecting my behavior so that I come across as some combination of needy, angry, relaxed and friendly. Quite a mess.

I was trying to take the NC advice of you all. I never reach out to him. But even in responding I seem to be having problems.

I just can't see any hope for his feelings to change. I feel very hopeless and confused. How did this happen and why can't I seem to turn it around? I really felt that there was still a spark of love inside him, why is he still denying it?

Just venting my friends. Hope everyone is having a good day!
Hugs, Lisa B