2.5 Months After D-day...and I wait

[DBinSF]

I'm addicted to affirmation and attention in that I've always been the class clown, I'm mildly narcissistic, I'm very concerned about appearances. I have fame fantasies. My parents were both emotionally unavailable growing up. I've learned I need to "reparent" myself as part of my recovery process.

The fantasies I indulge in are normally about strangers or people I meet briefly. I idealize them and tell myself that I'd be "happier" with them. That they are aomehow perfect. These are normally baseless fantasies as these people are total strangers or even people who would be really bad for me (party girls, bar tenders, etc)

I over value axe because it's something I can control. You can't hurt me if I'm just having sex with you. But if I fall for YOU AS A PERSON I might get hurt. And the commitment to marrow he fear is all about not being a good provider and husband. It's about fear if failure.