afraid I have waited too long #4

[nit84]

Well my W came to me last night and wanted to talk about property division.

It was a calm discussion and I sat quietly listened then answered when she asked for an answer.

I thought this the best time to bring up the refinance issue since I had her attention. More on this later.

All in all the talk went along with no problems. There were a couple times when we had disagreements but we muddled on through and came to agreement on most things.

Through listening to her it has become apparent that W is treating this as some sort of money making arrangement more than a dissolving of our M.

We went back and forth she I would like this, I agreed, I said I would like this W agreed. When we both wanted something we either figured it out or set it aside for further discussions.

The conflict in my mind came in when W said things like I don't have room for this or that so we will assign a value to it and work it out in other ways. I countered with I don't really want it but if you are leaving it here that fine. I don't think a money value needs to be assigned because you want something but have no place for it so I get by default and you want compensated for it monetarily.

I understand how rough this must be moving out of a house and into a smaller place or even an apartment and I respect your decision but I cannot be expected to "buy" things from you because you don't have room or don't want to rent a storage unit.

Then it went on further when she wanted something really bad. She keep making statements like I am allowing you to take 3/4 of the stuff and you don't want to let me have a mattress that I sleep on? I said that is a mattress that I slepted on also so take something else that you were "letting" me have in barter.

I relented on the mattress without too much problems but I got a feel for my W motives and didn't like it but thought Ok if I give a little on the property may be she will sign the refinance papers. I will continue that subject later but just wanted to put this out there.

I have chance to rediscuss what we talked about last night any suggestions on how I can handle it better?