I went to court today with my sister to be a witness in her uncontested D. Husband number 2. I was basically just there to say, "Yes, Your Honor, they've been separated a year. No, sir. There's no hope for reconciliation here."
I sat there and watched as couples sat together, angry or disinterested. One couple in particular had a lawyer sitting between them. I later overheard the H say: "there's nothing happy about this situation." And the W scoffed and said: "We never should have gotten married. We knew it wasn't right. I was outside the church doors and said, 'I don't want to go through with this.' But he said, 'Well, we have to. We've already filled out the paperwork'."
A judge asked a couple questions and signed the divorce decree. It took 15 minutes.
15 minutes?!?
15 MINUTES!!!!
Guys, I can't tell y'all how surreal it was for me to sit there and watch that. Sad. Marriages broken. Families destroyed. Just like that.
It made me appreciate these boards, and all you people, that much more. I mean, even if the Ms here don't work out in the end, the fact that there are people out there like you guys who are willing to fight so hard, and for so long, for Ms and families is really quite awe-inspiring and inspirational.
Just wanted to let you know I thought of you all today, and my hat's off to ALL of us here.
But now that I have you on the hook, I want opinions (I know, I know, you're all likely thinking: Here's ol' Train and one of her "questions" again); lol:
What, to you, does forgiveness look like? What does it mean? Is it a verb/an action? Is it FEELING the pain of an A, for example ... but never mentioning it again? Never holding it over the XWAS's head? Does it mean never bringing up bad things someone has done to us, even if those things still cause us to hurt?
I know forgiveness is mostly for the person who *offers* it. But what is forgiveness, really?
M: 40 H: 44 Married 14 years S11 & D6; D20 & D19 from previous M 2BDs/PAs, 8 years apart Piecing: April 2014
