MrBond - I do see the reasons why she doesn't trust me. I realize that my reaction to her snooping on my phone was, well...reactionary. I didn't see big picture.

Regarding your suggestion in your last paragraph -- I think I will do just that. However, I'm afraid her response will simply be, "I don't care."

I think I need to let it cool down for a couple of weeks before even attempting to bring that up. Establish a couple of weeks of friendliness. Don't start any new crap behind her back that would further erode whatever trust remains. In 5 days, I am going on a 10 day vacation (out of state) with my children, brother and SIL. This was a vacation that my wife booked and she was supposed to come with us. Understandably, now she doesn't feel comfortable going.

This will be good for both of us, I think. Of course, I'm going to fear that they will basically be living with each other during those 10 days, but there's nothing I can do so I have to stop worrying about that. What I also think about is the possibility of her bringing him to our house. However, that is a boundary that has been agreed upon, and I trust that she won't break it.

M: 15 years
BD: 6/25/14
EA/PA: starts 5/14/14
11/30/14 - A ends
5/15/15 - D is finalized.
11/28/15 - Start of new LTR with a wonderful woman (and still going strong)!