So, Wonka. What was the key to resolving things with Ms Wonka? Just time and GAL?
Nothing has been "resolved" with Ms. Wonka per se. She left me in August 2004 and moved right in with the OW. Got everything thrown at me by Ms. Wonka except the kitchen sink. Has been gone ever since.
Of course, I was devastated and did all the wrong things before finding DB as you can see from my screenname. Over time, I was able to detach and got on with my life. Dated, moved a lot (nature of my work), and seeking out new outlets such as picking up golf.
I suspect that our "story" is still being written as of now. Please keep in mind that I was a former kitty kitten MLCer who most probably acted wonky and hurt Ms. Wonka with my crazy-making MLC antics. Then she got involved with the OW out of her pain...I think. Then I became a LBS. Sounds like a bad Days of Our Lives show rip-off.
Wacky, isn't it??!
Originally Posted By: DBinSF
There's not an hour that goes by that I'm not thinking about her and missing her. Unpacking my crazy behavior and coming out of denial about my "issues" has been really hard. And it only makes me more certain that I want to work things out with her come hell or high water.
Like you, I thought constantly about Ms. Wonka early in my sitch. I had a very, very severe case of PTSD. Rapid weight loss in a month, couldn't sleep to save my own life, loss of appetite, and horrible nightly flashbacks. I tell you this because many newbies get the false impression of vets around here that DBing was a breeze for us. Oh my! No. Not true at all.
Use the gift of time to WORK on you. Because if you don't and you reconcile with W, then your issues will all come and bite you hard in the BUTT.
It'll make Bruce the Great White Shark look like a guppy fish.
Ignore your issues at your own peril.
Get crackin' with IC on your own emotional intimacy issues for it will be a looong road for you.
