Yesterday, my wife and I enjoyed a nice dinner together -- just the two of us. I tried my best to avoid conversations about my feelings, and about the situation. She kept trying to bring it up. It was almost as if she was interrogating me.
Afterwards, I found out why.
It appears that she's been snooping through my phone since last week (not sure which day). I'm not sure how she got the password, but no matter. She went through my text message and e-mail history.
She learned that:
1. I've been speaking to a woman I met online. She too is divorced and going through the same thing (WAS). We've been sharing each other's stories and providing each other emotional support. I have no romantic interest in this woman and we're both in situations where we want our spouses back.
2. I've looked through her phone call records. Her line is under my account. This explains the visit to the AT&T store last Sunday to get the account switched over.
She was furious about both things. She said that she gave me chances to "fess up" during dinner. It explained why she was interrogating me.
During her blow-up, she said, "I told you I'm ok if you dated. In fact, I encourage it."
I'm NOT dating anyone! She's insinuating that I am because I've been texting with a strange woman. I can see how she would come to that conclusion, but she came to that conclusion on her own without talking to me about it.
She's angry that I invaded her privacy, but she has no problem invading mine. Even looking back (after BD), she always asked me about the conversations I had with my best friend and my family. When I tell her that I want to keep that conversation to myself, she gets upset. Yet, I never asked her regarding details of her conversations to the friends/family that she spoke to. It was only last night at dinner that she offered the information.
I am mostly shocked about how she was able to carry on like nothing was wrong for 10 days and decided to blow this up in my face only last night. All the nice days we've shared, the enjoyment of family time, the nice words that were exchanged on a day-to-day basis. Were they all a lie? Were they all a ploy?
I'm totally stunned and I'm not sure what to do next.
I'm going to keep following DB because I can't lose focus of my primary goal -- mental health. Getting my wife back is secondary, especially now.
M: 15 years BD: 6/25/14 EA/PA: starts 5/14/14 11/30/14 - A ends 5/15/15 - D is finalized. 11/28/15 - Start of new LTR with a wonderful woman (and still going strong)!
