I think many long term DB'ers error on the side of not reaching out enough, basing this decision on the belief that their spouse will "miss them" and reach out first.
Hmmmm depends on the Mlcer - my xh used to respond to any reaching out by initial friendliness then a big emotional punch in the gut. A sort of 'come closer and then I can hit you again'
FY your wife is a 'nice' MLCer, some of them become vicious. no other way of describing their behaviour.
