I guess I am afraid if I push to hard she will leave.
Okay..it looks like you prefer to stay in the gay boyfriend zone forever. From my perch, I do see that you just don't want to set boundaries, enforce them, and step up as a leader in the M.
You've been given great advice in all of your previous threads.
What makes me despair about your sitch is this:
You won't do a single jot about it at all!!
Let me tell you something here. I have NEVER, EVER acknowledged Ms. Wonka's OW for over 9 years...not even brought up her name or GASP talk about her with Ms. Wonka!
Toward the tail end of our email convo back in March 2014, Ms. Wonka pretty much came right out and "demanded" that I acknowledge the OW.
My response?
I said that I do acknkowledge her (said the OW's name for the first time in 9 years!! Barf)...but it does not necessarily mean I have to respect her. Also stated that I have never respected her before, not now, nor ever will. And I ended it by stating that "there will be some subjects that we will not be able to talk about freely and this is one of them. It is just the way it is."
Complete silence from Ms. Wonka. That's ok with me. Because I'd be damned to even acknowledge or talk about the OW!!! Ms. Wonka's feelings/thoughts/reactions about my comments are hers to own. It's all on her. I was being authentic when I told her this.
This is MY boundary. And I suspect that Ms. Wonka is clear in understanding it. No, I am not mindreading here. The hard evidence is her total silence. Meh.
Ms. Wonka's feelings/thoughts/reactions about my comments are hers to own. It's all on her. I was being authentic when I told her this.