I have realized as a LBS I put too much focus early on on how I felt about her leaving, rather than what caused her to have to leave. It feels good. I still have no expectations, though I do have my vision as what I would like and hopefully in time that matches her vision. I get why she is wounded though and I think for the first time since splitting, she sees that I get it.
I'm new here and don't have much to offer in the way of advice, but I just wanted to chime in and say that I completely understand what you mean here. While I still disagree with my H's decision to move out, I see his perspective much more clearly now than I did before, and I understand better how my words and actions have wounded him. I'm glad that you were able to express that to your W and I hope she will give value to your words and to the space you are giving her to process them.
