I am also sitting here wondering if WAW is still going to be flip-flopping on R with me or not even now, after I sent her away and told her to just leave me alone from now on. Not that I derive pleasure from her being upset, but it would be comforting to know that she is at least still struggling with R with us or not.

I do feel like such an idiot though for falling into this trap. The nights of passion together she said I love you so many times. That's really what sold me I think. I was thinking the passion between us that she complained was gone forever from our marriage clearly wasn't gone at all and that she saw that. She did actually see that I think because she wrote this to me also in and e-mail after the FIRST night...much different than the words in her e-mail from yesterday posted above...this is in reference to the past couple months that I've been posting about...I finally did get some insight into what was in her head those months that I was posting here to. After reading yesterday's e-mail from her above...and then reading this one from the day before...you guys can clearly see how she made a sudden about face...shocking to me, I know it isn't to the vets though. She really sucked me in with words like this after that first night...

"I do not blame you one bit for moving on...I really wasn't giving you any reason to wait too long. I just really did not expect the court date to come so quickly. I also did not expect to feel the way I did last night. I mean I have battled with myself about the decision to end our relationship for a long time, had a lot of pain, lost a lot of weight....because I knew I loved you....but I wasn't sure if the passion was still there and I didn't want to pretend and cause you any humiliation or pain...so I kept moving forward in my "fog" thinking we could never be again.
Even last night when I came over, I knew that I still loved you, but didn't expect the feelings of passion. It has been so long since you have held me like that and kissed me....I just didn't expect it. Then when you did hold me and kiss me it took me by surprise as well. Everything just came flooding back....but moreso because now since everything is out on the table....I feel like perhaps we could have everything again, but better this time...wiser this time."

Amazing how she went from that on Monday to the about face on Tuesday. This is so hard to accept.

Last edited by ItHurts; 08/06/14 07:10 PM.
ME: 43 W:44
M 13 years on 5-5-01
T 18 years
BD 4/27/14
D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date)
WAW moved out 5/12/14
Papers filed 6/27/14
Divorce granted 07/17/14
Our marriage ends 11/17/14