Sorry that you're not getting good responses! Journaling should be good, too.
Has he still tabled the separation agreement?
I wonder about separation sometimes. I didn't do it, but sometimes I think it may have been helpful to both of us. It sounds to me like he's very unsure about what he wants to do. If he hasn't brought it up again, then let him continue sorting that out. It sounds to me like he's really quite confused about everything. OW may be pressuring him to move out...But if you're not pressuring him at all, then there's something to be said for that.
Remember, OW is a fantasy. She's not really real. If he moves in with her, things get real fast...His relationship with his family changes...sometimes that is the thing that makes them realize that the grass isn't greener, and the family was never the problem. It was something else within them that needed to be fixed.
