Lol gg, my thoughts exactly, H has been texting me for the past hour telling what he's doing, has said I'm more than welcome to stay the night if I want? yep, bizaro..... I'm watching criminal minds, don't mind me a bit of shemar Moore
So I am still at h, he came home very drunk at a hideous hour of the morning, insisted I stay, and that it was ok to sleep in his bed ( a few weeks ago when I stayed over to be here for the twins bday, he slept on the couch) we both got into bed, told bad jokes and went to sleep.....no physical contact, but hey in the same bed, complete turnaround from a few week ago.
M 35 W 31 D 10 Married 3 years Together 11 Single since Nov 13 Moved out Dec 13 ILYBNILWY, 'I don't want to be a boring housewife, 'I don't fancy you any more' OM confirmed Jun 14
interesting day today, I have watched h and observed...so this morning, I got up, gave the boys breakfast, hung out with them for an hour, then went to let h know I wad going home, he again thanked me for watching the boys last night, again no physical contact. I came home, pottered around, enjoyed the quiet. got a call from h asking if could drop off the pram, no issues there, I met him down the street, he had decided to go to a town close by to see if he could pick up some electric blankets for the boys, asked if I was doing anything and if I wanted to come along, I said sure, so off we go. halfway there we get a phone call from our old landlord saying how bad the house looked, that the cleaners we'd paid a fortune to do am exit clean had done a terrible job and that the new people were moving in today, so our trip turned sour very quick, dashed in, couldn't find what he wanted and had to rush back to deal with the house. I took the boys, and h headed to the house to re clean everything. I made the decision at that point to treat h as a friend, and any friend that was in the same predicament, I would try to help where I could. so I made dinner for all of us at h house, got the boys organised for bed, organised a sitter so I could go and help h with the final bit of cleaning, all of which he said he appreciated. by the time got there, H was pretty exhausted, running on little sleep and physically done, I think he must have got a text from ow as I got there as he looked p*ssed off and threw his phone across the floor. I chose to ignore it and just asked what I could do to help. We finally got the job done and we're standing out the front putting all the stuff in his ute. again h thanked me, and I him, gave me a hug and said he'd see me in the morning. so the observation part, today I wasn't falling apart and not detached as such, but aloofish, H backs the physical contact off and doesn't say as much. and the fact that ow is back from her weekend away is evident too, he just doesn't seem as happy as someone who is supposed to be in the start of a 'romance'(and I use that term loosely lol) I think h really does need to 'rescue' or to fix things, people, so when I'm being independent or not needing help (whether it be physically or emotionally) h backs off. How do you convey vulnerability without looking needy? I reading 5LL, I think h may be acts of service and or words of affirmation.... may be something to really look at.
I gal with the boys today, we went to a free playgroup run by the local primary school, the boys had a ball and I got to socialise with other mums. we went to local bakery for lunch and the park in the afternoon. We hung out at H's place for the day, as I was looking after them while he worked, and I didn't want to confuse them by bringing them home for the day and then taking them back round to h to go to bed. H has been acting distant since yesterday, did thank me again for helping out over the weekend, which I told him anytime, that he would do the same for me. He seems unhappy, says he's tired, but you're not with someone for 10 years without picking up on stuff. I asked if was ok, he said tired, I left it at that. Not my role to push the point anymore. We have the appointment with the school councilor tomorrow morning, it's just h and I meeting her tomorrow, then we decide on the best course of action to take for s7, how much do you tell the c? I would like her take on the ow an h wanting to introduce her to the boys, but I don't want to rock the boat with h u necessarily, he said he respected my opinion, and I guess my only option is to trust that he will honor that.
I agree gg, to both scenarios, so I'm actually glad he's going away with the ow on Thursday for a few days, he can everything he needs from her, I get time to just be...I think I'll also say given that he'll be doing something each night around the boys bed time, we'll put a hold on the goodnight calls for the time he's away, , not as an f you but just do what have to do and we'll see you when you get home. I don't want to be the cause of any more tension in his life, at least not amy that I could prevent by backing off. This is what a true friend would do, I think, be there if needed, but not in his face.
