Yep, bad idea. I hope I'm not speaking out of place here but I feel you seem to forget that he has feelings too. Unless I've read your situation incorrectly, he backed off because you laid out the transparency plan, he opened up to you about OW moving to his office and instead of discussing it in a constructive manner, you jumped on him. Since that happened, he's kept his distance and you appear to wonder why while mind reading like crazy.
Give the poor guy a break and look after yourself too. Get back on that PMA horse.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014