Quote: What brought you to the conclusion that you cannot do this? What part of this is not working for you? WHAT doesn't seem to be happening? The answer to either of these questions cannot be "all of it"; "I don't know"; "Just because" or anything of the sort. Put it down in the black and white...not the flowery words for sadness...the nuts and bolts of the PROBLEM.
I just can't seem to get over this hump! Things were ok for over a week. I get scared b/c h is a little withdrawn (duh!), I make ASSumptions about the future. I don't believe that h will love me like he used to. Yes, he is still here, so he must have some hope and belief that it can happen for us!!
I get so impatient! I want to hear words so desperately. I want changes NOW!!!
I have trouble biting my tongue b/c I think that if I have feelings, I need to express them, and if they are in regards to him, express them to him. THEN, I want him to HELP me resolve the feelings. ie telling me he does love me or does want to be with me, etc. THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN!!! So why do I keep trying???
Was talking with a friend this morn. and am going to write goals every day-how am i going to get through this day. what can i do for me? what do i have to look forward to, etc. ?
I also made a list of things that I can do for a little while when h & i are in the house together (a time out for me): take a bubble bath read/write walk dogs organize room/clean/put laundry away... exercise scrapbook play with pics online/digital camera list stuff on ebay to sell go for a drive (bookstore, library, coffee shop, ice cream stand! alright, so he might not want me to go there w/o him) Plan a trip work on budget wash truk/bikes decorate something sew curtains plan menu/organize cookbooks and recipes pull out stuff to donate.
what do i do when i want to give up??? thanks again! karen
