I'm giving the possible OM too much power. It doesn't matter what he says does or acts upon. I still love my wife and it matters what I do and say. I can control me, and make myself the perfect everything, or at least as close as I can get. I don't want to upset her, or make us both miserable. I want a clean path for the rest of my life. Whatever I do is for me, and maybe my kids, if I have a partner then they will be included. I think it's finally hitting me that no matter what I will be okay. I can do whatever I want, and I want to make things good, no matter with her or not.
This comes from seeing something on FB inadvertently. Just a comment of "why the sad face pretty girl" was on her sisters FB page, I was actually looking at pics of my kids on there. I saw that and started to freak, them I calmed myself and said who cares. I am still in this for the long haul, good or bad. I either want a happy wife or happy life. And I can do that through me. And I unfollowed her sister as well. Why even out myself in that scenario, I know it was stupid, I just miss my kids, but that's okay too. When I see them, makes it even that much better. A little backslide, but I kept it to myself and will continue too. Thanks for listening!!
