Funeral for a husband, love lies bleeding

[cczamo]

On another note, I'd been friends with a guy from my DivorceCare group who since March, increasingly expressed his interest in dating me. While I was still married he indicated that he wouldnt cross any inappropriate line, but once divorced, he named all the places he wanted to take me out.
Well D day came July 8th,and he was waiting. I pushed back a bit indicating that I still wasnt ready to officially date yet, but that I enjoyed his company and could be friends. We met often for coffee, Starbucks type "dates" and lots of phone calls and drinks occasionally. Hand holding and a little kissing occurred, which I had mixed emotions about. He was so nice and encouraging. Seemed to be very thoughtful. He's a bit older than I am, and that was an issue for me. I never had him come to my house. I had a feeling that things with him were "off."

Then I caught him in two lies.

He'd been telling me all along over several months that he went to West Point and afterwards Vietnam. I would ask him questions about his experiences and he'd be vague. I asked him if he graduated from West Point, to which he said yes, and I asked him where he'd been in Vietnam. He asked me not to discuss VN, as it was too painful and that he didnt even discuss with other VN vets, which sort of seemed plausible.

Last week, I finally asked him directly why he wasn't listed on a West Point website of graduates. He was obviously unaware that I could look this info up online. He'd been caught red-handed. He admitted to me that not only had he only gone to West Point for 3 months before being kicked out (weak ankle issues, supposedly he was recruited for their basketball team) and didnt graduate, but that he was discharged from military and had not gone to Vietnam at all.
I ended our relationship that night. Scarry stuff. Perhaps pathological liar. He'd woven such detailed stories about those "facts."
I'm obviously going to have to be more careful and less naive! He has been texting and calling and emailing that I'm the best thing since his divorce, he wants me to contact his family and former co-workers to know who he really is, and I'm not responding.

So that's my update.

I've at least over the hurdle of kissing someone else besides my ex H, now.