I'm sorry she told your daughter without you, Onguard. That was unconscionable. I hope she didn't flat-out LIE to her, as kids -- more than ever -- need honesty thru these difficult situations.
Do you think your wife would agree to FULL TRANSPARENCY in exchange for not moving out of the house? I tend to both agree and disagree with your counselor; separations DO rarely lead to anything positive, but at the same time I think it's perfectly wise, healthy and necessary for you to insist that your marital home NOT be used to conduct another affair. If you had a good transparency plan in place, including at least one channel of intel that your wife did NOT know about ("trust, but verify") then I could see allowing her to stay there, for the sake of your daughter and so that she could continue to see your positive changes.
I would NOT expect remorse from her at this stage, or even commitment -- this is pure "compliance" at this point, for the sake of the family unit.
Do you think she would agree to that? Could YOU remain detached if she were still under your roof?
