That sounds like stinkin' thinkin' to me. You're making a lot of assumptions and you're focusing on him rather than yourself. There is a new dynamic in play (is this the 2nd or 3rd week she's in the office) and it has its own timetable.
If resuming the affair is a definite dealbreaker for you, that's fine. But shouldn't you be absolutely sure that is what's happening before you pull out the cannon?
If you're undecided as to whether his pace is a dealbreaker for you then that's a different thing. Look at the timelines of the people around you. You are FOUR MONTHS OUT from discovering the affair. You are barely three months into your separation (not counting the failed reconciliation). You two have yo-yo'd all over the place in a really short period of time.
How much time is your marriage worth? The average that's cited around here is one month of reconciliation for every year of marriage. I know you're really upset and just want the pain to end, but you've really got to put things in perspective. From what I can tell you haven't taken the time to focus on yourself and find your center. You're largely just reacting to things. Don't make life decisions while you're in this mental place.
I hope your ADs start kicking in soon (they did miracles for me) and that today plays out better than it started. I'm sure Wonka and Starsky have the best course of action for you but I am behind you and wish you the best. Just remember, marathon not a sprint.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
