You have to remember who you have control of...YOU. Only YOU. To save yourself and your kids pain while she is flopping like a fish out of water, she must leave. You state the boundary, she won't agree to it, so she must find another place to live.

If you think you will somehow get her to see your point of view, you are mistaken. She sees you as someone that is keeping her from what she wants. If she stays and goes as she plans, she will be ripping your family into even smaller pieces. If you think you are a mess now, it will be 10 times worse when she leaves again and again. Find the strength for yourself and for your kids.

Kat

Me-53(and learning!)
S24, S21, D18, D17
Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory